Pondering feminism

I was discussing feminist topics with a couple of friends last night when the issue of men and trans people being excluded from some feminist events came up. I was reminded of an old blog post of mine where I decided not to call myself a feminist as the pressure from certain types of feminist became too much (N.B. I have since changed my mind about this). However, now I ask myself why anyone dares to think they have the right to tell other people who and what they are. Just because you enjoy sex, you can't be a feminist? Just because you don't go on protests and write on posters, you're can't be a feminist? Just because you weren't born (and remain) female, you can't be a feminist? We can label ourselves however we like, thank you very much! Wiktionary describes feminism as:

A social theory or political movement supporting the equality of both sexes in all aspects of public and private life; specifically, a theory or movement that argues that legal and social restrictions on females must be removed in order to bring about such equality.

This was my favourite definition from my, admittedly rather brief, search as it mentions equality and doesn't specify that this is only for women. (I'm not entirely happy with their use of the phrase 'both sexes' but at least it's more than one, which is a start.) In my opinion, anyone who is interested in feminist issues can call themselves a feminist, so why can't all these people be welcomed at all feminist groups and events? I doubt I'll ever be an activist but I don't think that makes me any less feminist than someone who is. I wonder if I should start a feminist discussion group that welcomes anyone who identifies as a feminist?

Just to be clear: I HATE Uggs

There are three types of footwear that I hate with a passion. One is Crocs, which are so out of fashion right now that I think I no longer need to worry about them. The second is the scourge of the summer known as flip-flops. The third is the slouchy winter footwear from hell... Uggs. As summed up perfectly by Bangs and a Bun in an open letter to the wearers of these crimes of fashion, there really is no valid reason for wearing these shameful items outside of the house. They were designed for wearing indoors and that is where they should stay, as their soft absorbent nature does not make them supportive or weatherproof enough for outdoor winter use. Yet many women continue to wear them whilst going on and on about how comfortable they are. So are slippers, but you wouldn't wear them outside the house would you?

Outdoor footwear should support your feet, making it easy to walk. In winter it should be sturdy, waterproof and, ideally, warm. Practical warm boots are everywhere this winter (see Bertie, Office, and Rocket Dog), so why pick something that is floppy, absorbs snow, harbours bacteria, and makes you look like you have cankles? There really is no need. Today I received an email asking me if I would like to offer my blog readers a discount on Ugg boots, which made me realise that I hadn't actually made my stance on these awful slabs of sheepskin known to you all. I'd like to think that anyone looking for money off such things wouldn't be here anyway.

Image via jrmyst's Flickr Photostream.

Lanvin for H&M

I must be sorely out of touch with fashion these days because when H&M announced their latest designer collaboration with Lanvin, I thought "who?". This is a brand whose presence has escaped me, but is clearly much sought after by the sort of people who will happily queue outside a high street store for a cheap garment bearing a designer label. Well, I say designer label, but it's not really is it? It's still H&M clothing and, much as I love them, their clothes are not the best quality. Clearly whoever had the first high street/designer collaboration idea, was a bit of a marketing genius though. It turns a bland store into a destination for must-have items; it generates publicity when announced and when, inevitably, the limited stock sells out; and it promotes the designer to the plebs like me who'd never heard of them in the first place. OK, so the designs themselves may be weak, but nobody really cares, do they? It's about saying you have something with a Lanvin label, or being able to grab lots to sell on eBay at an inflated price.

However, H&M's big mistake this time was launching the collection so soon after the launch of their online shop. Before now, the only way to get your hands on this sort of stuff was to stand in line outside a large store and elbow your way in once the doors opened. This time round, plenty of people stayed at home to grab their chosen items, and plenty more who would never think of queueing decided to give it a go as well. Predictably, H&M's fledgling online store caved in under the traffic this morning and I'm wondering if this will this undo all the good publicity that these sorts of launches usually generate for a store. Someone missed out a whole load of forward planning on this one, didn't they?

Fit, feel and drape

I really don't like buying clothes online. As yet another massive fashion retailing website goes online this week - Google's Boutiques.com - I find myself wondering if I'm in a dying breed or real-world shoppers. It's ideal if you have no problem finding clothing that fits and if you're permanently at home to await postal deliveries, but how many people do you know who are like that? Teenagers in their academic vacation time perhaps. Even if you find something that looks gorgeous and you're willing to risk a poor fit and a missed delivery, how can you tell whether or not the garment is worth the asking price until you see it in real life? How can you tell if the fabric feels cheap and the seams look dodgy? Maybe this doesn't matter so much to fashion-conscious teenagers as it does to me, but it is an issue. No hassle-free online returns system can make up for the feeling of being back to square one in your search, when the garment that looked so stylish in the photo turns out to fit badly and scratch your skin.

Of course, some times you have to buy online as there is no alternative for the product you want, but I really don't get how buying fashions that are available in-store can be anything other than a massive headache and/or potential disappointment if done over the internet. They say the camera never lies but, in the case of fashion photography especially, that's a load of rubbish. Any cheap nasty outfit can look good if you photograph it well and, even with a trained eye, it can be tricky to spot something that will look bad in real life. My suggestion is to use the internet to browse and the stores to buy, and only purchase high street clothing online if your size is out of stock. Mind you, I've always had a bit of a thing for the feel and drape of fabric.

Figgy pudding and cocktails

Most people I know fall into one of two camps when it comes to Christmas - the 'meh' camp is made up of people who don't really care about anything other than the time off work it grants them, whereas the 'squee' camp get excited about any and all aspects of the holiday season. Usually I am a member of the former group, saving excitement only for festive foodstuffs prepared by other, more talented people, but every now and again something comes along to make me feel slightly more seasonal than usual. Last year, preparations for The Rebel Rebels' December show had me quite excited about Christmas far in advance of Doctor Who Day itself, with our office-Xmas-party-themed group act featuring large amounts of both tinsel and Wizzard. This year, I have to admit that the annual slightly overly sentimental John Lewis Christmas advert has actually got me a teeny bit excited about getting our Nightmare Before Christmas Tree out again. Somehow they just manage to tap into that whole festive nostalgia thing and make me go "aww" when I should be saying "bah humbug".

However, I am tempted to combine the two - burlesque and festive nostalgia, that is - by purchasing the apron in the photograph above to lounge around in on 25th December. As I am of no use to anyone on the actual cooking side of things, I suspect this apron would simply be used to keep me from getting Christmas dinner on my lingerie, a job for which it is perfectly suited as the AGA Cookshop website accurately describes it as "delightful and unashamedly feminine". In fact, I may actually venture into the kitchen in this little number, if only to mix up some tasty Hendrick's hot gin punch.

All the small things

Recently I've been getting angry about the slightest thing. When stress levels are high, I'm usually the person who is calming everyone down with a smile and kind words, but increasingly I've been realising that I'm ranting for no reason. Like a Daily Mail reader, or a BBC Have Your Say commenter, I'm finding annoyance in the tiniest thing and letting the unnecessary anger overwhelm me. Why is this happening? Why is someone who was once so calm and collected now practically yelling at her phone when she can't find a widget to quickly put it in silent mode?

People on the street annoy me - from their dire taste in fashion to their dismal parenting skills -and I actually let it wind me up. Not just on paper, but in person too. Friends and family are bearing the brunt of my small-things-rage at the moment so, thankfully, I haven't yet got myself into a massive argument with a stranger, but it can't be long before that happens if I don't put a stop to this now. Before I end up like Angry Dad, or start losing friends, I think it's time for a cup of tea and a sit down. Aaaaand relaaaax.

The Big Swish: Secrets of the Boudoir

I signed up for clothes-swapping website Big Wardrobe a while back in the hope of exchanging some of my rarely worn items for something I would actually use, and had varying degrees of success. Everyone seemed friendly enough and all of the users I encountered were completely genuine, however, I did have trouble actually finding something I wanted to exchange for my garments. It may be the case that a lot of people have items that you want, but they're sadly not always the people who want yours! Essentially, popping along to a swish is the same kind of thing, only you don't swap directly with one person - it all goes into one big collection for everyone to rummage through later. This sounded like a much better idea so, after missing out on going to a delightful lingerie press event myself recently, I decided to sign up for The Big Swish's Secrets of the Boudoir event and sort out some clothes to take along with me.

The information said to bring "party frocks, lingerie, accessories and heels" so, after a rummage, I found some pretty red shoes that I'd worn only twice due to discomfort, a steel-boned corset, a steel-boned waist cincher, a faux-fur shrug, an evening bag and a pair of satin pyjamas. All went into a bag to be taken along to the venue and I was reassured by the rules that nothing in bad condition or from Primark would be accepted, so assumed that I'd be able to grab some similar quality items in return, even if I failed to get as much back. I headed off that night to Amika in Kensington to meet some new people, watch some demonstrations and grab myself some pretty clothes.

Once I'd handed in my items, I treated myself to a Tanqueray and tonic and got chatting to a few of the experts. After a short while, the talks and demos began and we were treated to stockings expert Catherine from Kiss Me Deadly giving us the lowdown on suspender belts plus the differences between stretch, nylon and fully-fashioned stockings. The stunning Bex - face of Velda Lauder and queen of the 18" waist - showed us how to lace yourself into a steel-boned corset, and also invited a corset virgin from the audience to have a go. There was also an introduction to the key elements of vintage/pin-up style make-up by The Hourglass and I was volunteered by the lovely ladies at Playful Promises to be Nicole's model for her hair and make-up demonstration. Despite a severe lack of time and light, she cleverly managed to make some dramatic changes to my daytime look that survived subsequent cocktail drinking and an extremely windy journey home (see photo above). After all this excitement, my G&T ran out and my mood sadly took a downward turn. The start of the swishing was announced and the VIPs were set loose with a five minute head start... proceeding to take everything that was halfway decent before the rest of us were even allowed in the door! This is something I was prepared for as I hadn't bought a VIP ticket, however, rather annoyingly The Big Swish chose not to grade all items that were brought along to this particular event, so I suspect that many of the people who walked away with the good stuff had actually brought the rubbish that remained on the rails.

However, next came a little something to cheer me right back up again. Organisers from cabaret venue Volupté were there to introduce us to a handful of male burlesque acts to round off the evening, including the raunchy Spencer Maybe and the truly delightful Major Suttle-Tease (if anyone knows the name of the third act, please let me know as I've forgotten it!). All of the performers coped spectacularly well with some terrible technical problems from a venue clearly not used to handling such a show, and there were many extremely happy ladies in the audience. All in all, the event was well organised and enjoyable, but I would recommend that The Big Swish reinstate their points system and clamp down a bit harder on their no-Primark rule. I came home with a lovely Kiss Me Deadly suspender belt, but really did wish I'd kept that spotty waist-cincher and faux-fur shrug so I'd recommend never to taking anything really nice to a swish if you want a decent swap. If you want to get your hands on some pretty things, instead of swishing I'd suggest you get yourself down to the Playful Promises boutique on Bethnal Green road between 3rd and 6th December as they have a sample sale on. I'll definitely be putting that one in my diary.

First image via The Big Swish. Fourth image via Spencer Maybe's MySpace.

Busy little bee

Clock... work?
Originally uploaded by lipsticklori

Recently I have been far busier than I thought I would be. On my return from holiday, I reckoned things would be calmer which would allow me to be slightly more productive than I have been of late. Sadly not. The few evenings at home that I have had are taken up with writing, laundry and far less relaxation than I would like, so I have had very little time to chat online to folks far-away or other essential internet-based stuff. Starting my new job this week has left very little time for Twitter, Facebook, email and blogging... making me realise just how much time I was spending on that in the office! However, until someone comes up with a way to create more hours in a day, I think I'm stuck with making some changes myself. So, this weekend I shall make time to better organise my life. Well, that's the plan, anyway.

Misgendering

On Monday we discovered that there was a new World Scrabble Champion. I thought it was odd that the winner of a board-game championship was deemed newsworthy until I saw the accompanying photo of Mikki Nicholson in her bright pink outfit... and then read the terrible article that accompanied it in most news sources. If you are writing a story about a transsexual woman, why would you use the pronoun 'he' throughout? The Metro did it, The Sun did it, and even The Independent and The Guardian spectacularly failed to refer to Mikki's gender correctly. Only The Guardian has since updated their piece online with a correction but, sadly, not an apology.

How much longer will some "journalists" sarcastically report a transsexual person's gender in quotes while revealing what they view to be the truth in capital letters? It's not big and it's certainly not clever. No one's trying to trick you - is a tiny bit of respect for other people completely beyond your capabilities? Even when writing about something they don't understand, surely all paid journalists have a duty to get the facts straight?